Yes, It's true: Green Bean Casserole is an Abomination

You know the stuff I am talking about!  It is bland, mushy, devoid of food value, and morally corrupt.  It is invited into people's homes for the holidays, and some people love it.  It is green bean casserole, my friends; quake in fear!!

Public Enemy #1

This stuff is not exciting.  There are so many things one can do with food in this life, and this is the most boring.  Green beans, cream of crap soup, and deep fried onion bits.

The really odd thing about this is that people are polarized about it.  Some people have orgasms at the mere mention of it.  Others,like me, hate the dish with a passion.

Maybe if we put some pico de gallo on it?  Perhaps chocolate sauce?  Probably can't turn a sow's ear into a silk purse, though.
Anybody have ideas to make this stuff even slightly interesting?  How about some habanero peppers?

I think I have a problem with two of its three ingredients.  Cream of whatever is kinda wrong by itself.  It's primary flavor is salted fat.  There are usually chunks of whatever you are creaming; and the fact that you are creaming it probably means that whatever you are creaming is not really considered pleasant to eat by itself by the people the people doing the eating.

This either vilifies the eaters or the dish, either way it pisses me off!!

Deep fried anything is the same:  salt, fat, designed to disguise whatever you are wrapping this stuff around; and not very good for you.  Finally there are green beans.  Nothing wrong with these...unless they have the living shit cooked out of them!!  Put all this garbage together and what do you have?  A meaningless journey into the vacuous land of comfort-foodish, bland, white-trashy, death in a casserole dish.  It might be good for soaking tired feet in after a long day, but that is all.

Yep.